I've been Remiss

Well, blogger friends I have been a bit of a slacker in the newsy newsy of our little family because I just haven't wanted to post. If I can be totally honest with you, my fellow readers, I've pretty much been hating life the last few days. I can't seem to get a very good handle on my emotions. I want to like people, but mostly I just get annoyed by something they say or do.

What is wrong with me? Unlike my saintly, think nothing but the best of the human race, husband most of the population just irritates the crap out of me right now. I think it's the hormones! I mean, I feel out of control, but I can't make myself be more in control. Do you feel me? It's so frustrating. I mean, I go to church and learn about Christlike love and I WANT to feel it, but then I get all grouchy.

And then to make matters worse, Ethan says to me the other day, "When are you and dad getting divorced?"

Cricket. Cricket.

"Well, Ethan we aren't getting divorced. We are fighting kind of a lot lately aren't we? Because I'm grouchy?"

"Yeah."

It freaking broke my heart. I tried to explain to him that just because adults argue doesn't mean that they are getting divorced. And that I would try harder not to fight with dad. So, we are having a dinner and a family talk tonight trying to calm the fears of my 7 year old. How crappy is that? Well, now that you all are scared away from me because you think I'll hate you and think I'm the worst parent on the planet, judge me. Or not, but know that I love you all, I just don't know how to show it right now...

Just One Little Slip

That's all it took. One little slip off the side of the bench at the park. It wasn't a particularly hard fall, just a precise fall. Right on her collarbone. Enough to break the poor thing. She wasn't hardly crying at all until I told her we needed to take her to the doctor. Then she really started crying about shots and dying and stuff. Then I think it really started hurting and then it was crying for about 2 hours until we got Tylenol into her at the Instacare. But she's doing well and on a small dose of Loratab.

Preschool Graduation

Check out the video in full screen to get the full effect. That is all. Have a good week!

Utter Mortification

I realize that a lot of my posts begin and end with something that has embarrassed/exasperated/tested my patience to the max. I unabashedly do not apologize for this. These events in my life make me grateful to have kids with...spunk?! Right?! And it's for your amusement, so you, the reader, can say, "I am glad that's not my kid."

Well, last night was one for the record books. E gets home from school and I ask him how his day was. His answer as of late has been, "...mostly bad." Today was no different. Lately his teacher has been punishing the students by making them lay their heads on their desks when they don't stop talking. I don't have a problem with this. I have a problem though when the whole class has to be punished for one kid that's talking. The other day they had their heads on their desks for almost 20 minutes while they missed P.E. Where is the logic in that?

So Ethan says, "I got so frustrated today that I started writing notes."

"Well, what did the notes say?"

"I wrote that I hope you are nicer to your class next year." Meaning his teacher of course.

"Oh, what did you do with the notes you were writing?"

Now, I knew the worst was coming and had that crap feeling in the pit of my stomach when I heard his response.

"On Mrs. _____ desk."

Uggggggggh. Crap.

"Well, Ethan that was a very mean thing to write. And tomorrow you'll have to apologize to your teacher for writing that."

"Why is that rude? I thought I was helping her to know she wasn't being a very good teacher."

Ugggggggh. Then I had to explain why that was a bad way to behave and that I would talk to his teacher and try and get it sorted out after he apologized. He started crying and saying that his teacher was going to hate him and he didn't want to go to school today. But we said a little prayer this morning to help him to be brave. I REALLY hope he is. But seriously, what the freak?! It's so awkward. Luckily there's only one more week of school after this, right?

Update

Just to let any of you know who might be interested, I did have a talk with that little girl's mother about her situation. Last week we were pulling up into her street and she asked if I could take the long way home to her house because she knew that her step dad would be home. I offered to let her come hang out at our house for a few hours and she was really excited. But then when I texted her mother, she got really suspicious and we ended up talking about what was going on. She seemed a bit in denial about the situation saying that her husband and daughter "don't see eye to eye..." That's bull in my opinion. Time to grow up and act like an adult dude. Anyway, we discussed counseling and things, but I doubt anything will happen. I parked in front of the house feeling pretty bad and out walks the step dad, yells something to this girl, rolls his eyes and walks back in. Why are people such jerks?

I need to barf again.

Earth Day and a Predicament

So Ethan's class did an Earth Day performance of sorts with singing and poems. I was able to catch Ethan's on the camera.

But on to the second part of my title. I have a problem that I'm having a hard time with and I need your help. I drive carpool with two other woman in Ogden. One of these is a girl in fifth grade. I drove Friday morning to her house and when she stepped into the car she was crying. Not just a little like a lot. And her eyes were puffy and all that. So, my drive is about 20 minutes to Ethan's school. My heart has gone out to this girl since I started driving because her parents are divorced. And it was an ugly divorce with her dad ending up in jail for trying to meet an underage girl that he met on the internet. This girl turned out to be a cop. So, her mom and her left Arkansas and traveled around for a year or so living with friends, boyfriends and the like until the ended up here. In Ogden. Her mom had a lot of depression issues and so this little girl has had to grow up too fast. Her mom is now remarried to a guy with whom they share a little girl who is 18 months. Sorry for the long back story, okay, so she's told me all this over the last year because I think she feels safe riding in my car and talking to me. So this Friday she got into my car after getting in trouble for not having her room clean because she spent the night having to watch her little sister in her room while her step-dad took a nap. When she tried to explain to her step-dad that she couldn't because she was watching the baby her told her not to back talk. She got so frustrated that she started crying. Her told her that she needed to stop crying or he would take her outside and give her something to cry about. That's when I pull up.

Gulp.

Then she confides in me that her step-dad is really mean to her and spanks her a lot and all that. I asked about her mom and if she's ever talked to her about him and she said that she just cries when she tries to talk to her. And then her step-dad gets mad at her for telling. Uggggh. Even writing this is making me mad.

Now understand that I spank my kids. Not a ton, but I do on occasion. My problem is when step parents physically discipline their step kids. I don't know why. It bugs me. When I was a new parent I was a lot more harsh with my step daughter than was necessary. I didn't realize this until I had kids and realized that kids are kids and to, well, breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

There's a lot more that she told me that I think are not okay, but not would not necessarily warrant a call to Child Services. Do you know what I mean? So help from all is needed. Thanks. I'm going to go throw up now. Not really I just don't like to think about how much children suffer because of crappy adults. It makes me sick.

Here's my pregnant belly for all you people who like the idea of seeing someone suffer through a pregnancy while you aren't. Bucky was a good sport and put his belly out there to make me feel better... :)